Ridiculous!  Do you know that I started this blog in 2006 and only have 113 posts, this being 113.  I am so LAME!  Okay, now you know.

So.... My Auntie Ploppy gave me an awesome bike. 
She is a CUTE robin egg color cruiser that is called a Pacific.  Perfect name.  I ♥ the Pacific.  Pacific NW, Pacific Ocean, Pacific rim, Pacific Islands, Hawaii.  Wait.  That doesn't have a title with the word Pacific in it!  Ah!  I make everything about Hawaii!  I love that place... I love that mental escape.  Am I romancing the idea of Hawaii?  Maybe.  Do I care?  No.  Is it the most wonderful place on earth?  Yes.  Anyway, back to the bike.  Even with the PERFECT name I felt the need to re-name her Electra.  Weird.

 

Why do I have so much anxiety around naming things?  Livie turned 1 on Saturday and while chatting with Becky tonight, I asked if it was too late to change Livie's name to Juno (that was her name when we first found out we were having baby #2.  My friend , Suzanne, suggested that her middle name begin with an A so her initials would be JAH- fitting. 

Anyway, I was just kidding (again!), but really?  End the joke.  End the uncertainty.  We named her Livie Sunshine!  That is who she IS.  She was born smiling and hasn't stoped for 368 days.  She LIVES SUNSHINE. 

Well, back to the original point.  I took the girls on a ride today.  Livie was on the back and Lola was riding her own bike.  We rode to the park about a mile from our house.  Lola and I just rode along talking about the color of the leaves, counting magleeshes while Livie rode on the back trying to put her hands down my crack and poking my back dimples saying bell-ba (belly button). Needless to say, it was awesome. 

On the way home  I had a flat and had to walk the bike home.  My first instinct was to be annoyed.  It was just the lazy in me.  Turns out walking was so magical.  I got to walk right next to Livie and I was able to have wonderful conversation with both my girls.  I was able to really point things out to Livie.  Usually I am pushing her in the stroller, and although we are still together, there is something so sweet about walking side by side. 

Although I like to spend time in my fantasy land of Hawaii

 I love spending time in Boise. 

 My here and now is pretty amazing.  I love my life.  I love my family.  I love being a mom.

It is good to be me

I have had my doubts as a parent. 



I feel like I am lazy or too grumpy, or neglectful.
I think that is part of being a mom. 

And although having other people tell you that you are doing a good job, you don't really believe them because they don't know the everyday person that you are. 

The only ones that can tell you, the only people who can truly recognise your ability are your family.

Okay, your kids. 

Tonight Lola looked at Brian and I and said,

"you

guys

are

sensitive

and

have

peaceful

hearts."

If that is what our  five year old sees... I guess we are doing alright ;)

High Hopes

*****Please excuse the photos. God was not nice when he gave me a potato head, and Brian would like you to know that the moustache was a joke. *****

The other night I had a dream/nightmare where I find out that I am pregnant. I go into the The Baby Place (by the way, look at the new arrivals under October!!!) insisting to speak with Colleen all the while feeling SO embarrassed that I am pregnant already. Holly asks what is wrong and I hold up a pregnancy test stick all dramatic like.



I woke up feeling scared, embarrassed, surprised, stupid, excited.... too many things for 5:30 am.
So I tell my friend who, in return, reveals that she really is pregnant (with one of those "we didn't even have intercourse" stories that freak you out). So we start talking about birth control namely the Femcap. She tells me that I can just go get one from the midwives, it will last for a year and it works great when you use it.

I have decided I want to go the Famcap route and start telling Brian all about it. The following is how the conversation went:

A: "It is like $75.00 and it lasts for a year!"
B: "How does it work?"
A: "Well you have to put it in every time."
B "Eww."
A: >: (
B: "Well how do they know how many to send you?"
A: "What do you mean?"
B: "I mean, how do they know how much sex you are going to have. You said it lasts for a year."
A: "Yeah. Well, I guess they figure the product needs to be replaced every year. Maybe they get old."
B: "But how many do they send you? What like 60 a month?"
A: "No, you get 1. Wait... you thought... HA! HAHA! HAHAHAAAAA!"

I love that guy!

Lola The Furnace and The Fat Kid Inside Me

Look at this face! Have you seen a cuter girl... I think not (actually, Livie is pretty dang cute too!), but you know what I mean. She has been fighting a bug for the past 13 days now with a fever of 102-104.3 for about 11 of those days. For the most part she is her happy smiling self, but since she has pneumonia I have been keeping her down. She is going crazy! She just wants to run, play, joke and be loud. She just wants to be better!

When she first got sick the boys were in town. She wanted so bad to play basketball, ski and go to the Y with them. Aside from one walk in the park, she spent her time drinking tea and being snuggled. Look how cute she is!

She hasn't had much of an appetite, eating just a few bites (if that) at every meal. So last night after looking in the fridge and finding nothing, I decided to make breakfast for dinner. By saying "I decided to make, " I really mean Brian made. When everyone got so excited about the idea (keep in mind that I hate this meal) I decided to do whatever i could to make Lola eat it. This is where my inner fat girl comes in. I pulled out the whipped topping (Cool Whip to you rich folks), and chocolate syrup! She made her waffle look so good that I decided I should try said toppings on my waffle too. Now I realize that I am not sick, but does it count that I have been cooped up here too? No? Okay, I am just a sugar hound and wanted to indulge. Yummy! So, don't judge me or my parenting skills, I just wanted her to get something in her tummy... Oh guess who ate almost half of her dinner!